Justice in university

artwork by haleyincarnate.tumblr.com

If you’re close to me, you’ll be familiar with the situation that I found myself in.

I found myself involved in a police case. A police case regarding the death threats that had been sent to me.

For a long time, I was in denial, I was scared.

"What have I done to cause this? "

"Is this my fault? "

"Did I do something to deserve this?"

I began to doubt myself.

I began to believe that I had caused the threats towards me.

I began to believe it was my fault.

Sure, on the outside I definitely acted like it was nothing,

“Whatever, they’re just words” That is what I would tell the people around me.

This harassment would go on for over a year - with each message getting more and more severe.

It wasn’t until I received the death threats that I decided to talk to someone about it. There was this slow realisation and a lengthy intervention from some close friends which got me to realise that this wasn’t going to stop unless I took action.

Before this, I had done everything in my power to avoid - even to my own detriment, I switched labs, I switched tutor groups, I even limited interactions with mutual friends as so to avoid him.

When I eventually told someone, I was scared. I had screen-shotted all the evidence I had against him and despite the pages of information, I was still scared.

I wasn’t so scared that I wasn’t going to be believed, rather I was scared of what would happen - or what wouldn’t happen.

Unfortunately, that fear seemed to have some grounding as here I am, almost 6 months since I first reported the incident, with a piece of paper - one which the university is asking me to sign, essentially to brush the incident under the rug.

This definitely isn’t the outcome I wanted. Yet, if I don’t sign this piece of paper, I essentially open up a possible investigation against myself - against my own actions, where I am the one being criticised.

That itself is wrong on so many levels.

I realise that this isn’t a rare occurrence, so much so that a staff member I spoke to told me, that it’s almost common that the university takes their time when it comes to these incidents, that often those involved graduate before anything happens.

So what is retribution worth? Is it worth the strain to my mental wellbeing from the criticism I open myself up to if I decide to pursue this case?

The actions of the university, or rather lack of action gives the message that it is okay to behave this way - If you want to send death threats or harass an individual for the greater part of a year then that’s not ideal, but don’t you worry, should you find yourself in this situation, you’ll only have to sign a piece of paper saying you won’t do it again.

Disappointed is not enough to describe how I feel towards the university for how they’ve handled this.